Charlotte's Niece
by Pamela
Chapter 11
"I am so sorry, Ethel," I said after I had stopped crying, "the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you! But its just that...that I had such high hopes of getting to know Linda and the other girls. We had a lot in common. It was going to be so much fun! And now they think I'm a freak, a weirdo, a pervert!"
"Enough of that Greg," Ethel said wearily. "Don't beat up on yourself. There's just a clash between you and Charlotte. It sometimes happens. I don't know why. I have no doubt that she's very fond of you, and I think it's because of that, that she wants to, how can I say it, "educate" you about your inner feelings."
"But all her analysis of me is mean!"
"Don't say that, Greg. Give her more credit than that. She just wants you to look inside yourself and find the explanations for some of your behaviors. You were wearing your mom's bras long before you ever tangled with Charlotte!"
"It was just my private thing!"
"Yes, it started out that way, but your mom and Lei were aware of it, or suspected it. Then it became very public, and you did take Vickie's panty."
"Yes, yes, Ethel, I know the whole story, I've heard it a million times from Charlotte. I'm evil, that's the answer!"
Ethel shook her head. "Look, Greg, you owe it to me at least to just think a bit more seriously about the issues Charlotte raised. A perfect place to begin is why do you have to interpret what she said as that you are evil?"
"Its wrong to wear my mom's bras. Its wrong to wear Vickie's panties!"
"Its wrong to take other people's underwear, its not wrong to wear a bra or panty!" Ethel said.
"You mean, if I had somehow gotten my own bra and panties, and wore them instead of my mom's, then it would have been OK?"
"Well, yes and no," Ethel said struggling to think through the moral issues.
"You see, that's what I'm saying, Ethel. You all believe it's wrong of me to wear a bra, any bra."
"That's not what I'm saying. What is wrong is to take someone else's underwear and use it to masturbate with. That's kind of yucky, and not nice to them. But if you wanted to borrow or wear their bra, say you told your mom that you had these kind of feminine feelings and that you wanted to wear her bra, she would have to accept your honesty. Then she could either say, OK, Greg here is a bra you can borrow, like she might do with Lei, or else she might take you out shopping for a bra. At least this way, you're being honest with yourself and your mom."
"The third possibility is that she says, "No Way" and she finds me a shrink!"
"Don't be facetious, Greg. You're always quick to be facetious!"
"I'm sorry Ethel. What you say sounds really nice, but I find it hard to imagine that I could just ask my mom to wear her bra, or ask her to take me shopping for a bra."
"It would take courage, because it would be an admission that you're not like the average boy, and you're probably really afraid of disappointing her. Its your fear of hurting her, that would make you find it hard to ask her."
"I suppose so."
"But suppose you knew for a fact that your mom would have absolutely no problem with your wearing a bra, lets say just around the house. Say you overheard her discussing the topic with a friend or something. Then would you feel any regret?"
"I don't know, I suppose I would feel a lot better about it.
Like I had permission from my mom."
"So, here is the important question, Greg. Suppose that your mom, I mean your real mom, Lillian, absolutely didn't care if you wore her bra or not. I mean not even an ounce of regret about it, then would you ask her to loan you or buy you a bra?"
"But there's my dad and Lei!"
"I'm saying just pretend that your mom is the only one around.
What would you do?"
I thought about it for a minute and then said, "yes, Ethel."
"Yes what?"
"Yes, I would ask her. I would want to wear her bra. I think I would prefer to get my own bra, though, because I'd want it to be prettier than her bras."
Ethel smiled at Greg. "That is a very brave admission young man!"
"Now you're calling me a man!"
"Because it is a brave and manly thing to be honest with yourself! And don't you now see an inkling of what all the fighting with Charlotte was about?"
"No, I don't understand."
"Don't you remember. You kept denying any possible expression of your having a genuine desire to wear a bra. It was always, "just an experiment," or "just to see what it felt like," or something you would soon be stopping from doing. Never, did you say. Darn it! I like wearing bras! I feel a need to wear a bra. I feel like a girl. I want to be pretty like a girl. Please, mommy dress me like a girl! Make me pretty!"
"OK, OK, OK!" I said, absolutely bright red in the face.
"Well?"
"But the reality is that my mom probably would be real disgusted with me."
"You can't say for sure, Greg, it probably matters how sincere you were when you discussed it with her. If she knew that this was the way you truly felt in your heart, then she very well might be accepting of you."
"But then my dad and Lei."
"Well, I can't venture to speculate about your dad. Men are very much trained to frown on men who aren't completely male. Its part of their natural competitiveness. It would be a sign of weakness on your dad's part to say, "fine, Greg, go along and wear bras if you like, ho ho ho."
I laughed and Ethel joined me. "Its a pretty funny thought. My dad would never approve!"
"What if you found out that he wore bras?"
"Yuck! I'd really freak out!"
"Why?"
"I guess its cause I really need him to be a man."
"That's well beyond me, Greg. Boys and their dads, that's tough for women to understand! But what about Lei?"
"She'd act just like Linda and the other girls. Complete disgust!"
"You think so?"
"I'm sure."
"Well, I suppose its something to do with younger girls," Ethel said. "She probably would feel threatened by you. Like right now she has all the femininity locked up, and you'd come along and take some of it away. For instance, she's your dad's only daughter, and she probably would want to keep it that way."
"Anyway, we already saw what Linda thinks about me dressing up!"
"She probably felt threatened. If boys starting competing with girls in being feminine, then girls would lose their advantages."
"That doesn't sound very plausible," I said.
"Perhaps you're right. Maybe young girls don't have much experience. They just want the world to be well ordered. Girls are girls and boys are boys. Having a boy who wants to be a girl, complicates the whole picture. In fact, maybe it means that Linda wouldn't have to settle for a guy like Mike who doesn't know anything about girls feelings."
"I really do enjoy talking to you Ethel," I said spontaneously after a pause.
"And I enjoy your company, Greg!"
"I feel like you don't feel any less of me cause I admitted that I'd like to dress up like a girl."
"That's true and believe it or not, Charlotte would feel the same way!"
"I wish she'd act more like that!"
We sat in silence for a couple of minutes, until Ethel said, "you know, Greg, as long as you are living here this summer, and your mom and dad and Lei are away, and Charlotte and I both feel that there is nothing wrong if you want to pretend to be a girl, then its sort of like what we were saying before. Its a situation where you can just feel good about yourself. I don't know what to think about your mom and dad, but lets just concentrate here on this summer. The next ten or eleven weeks or so. No harm would be done if you just lived the way you wanted. No one would think anything bad about you!"
I mulled over what she had said. Basically, it was a way to give myself permission to dress up, without feeling guilty. It was hard to imagine having the freedom to be dressed as much as I wanted. Of not having to sneak around and masturbate quickly in the bathroom.
"I'm going to go in and check up on Charlotte," Ethel said, "she's stopped sobbing. At least not so loudly that we can hear."
"Tell her I'm sorry, Ethel!"
"I'll see what I can do, Greg." Ethel got up and quietly walked to Charlotte's bedroom and disappeared inside and shut the door behind her.
I wondered to myself why I wanted Ethel to tell Charlotte that I was sorry. Sorry? How could I be sorry. She was as evil as a woman could be! But there was no doubt that I had hurt her seriously, and I worried what the aftermath of it would be. Maybe Charlotte would throw me out of the apartment. She'd probably make up some horrible story about me and Vickie's bra and panties, and tell my mom and dad, and watch them scramble to come home and take care of me. I prayed that Ethel could figure out some way to make Charlotte feel better, and that she'd come back and tell me not to worry about Charlotte.
I re-lived the moment with Linda and the girls again, and prayed that somehow time could go backwards, so I could change things so that I had taken one less step into the living room. I suppose Ethel could have just blurted out to me, "Stop!" or something like that, but maybe she was afraid that that would only cause the girls to come and take a look. God! Linda had definitely heard me say something about fitting three panties in the bra cups. Boy, she must see me as an absolute pervert! And what about Charlotte's girdle and stockings? While I could maybe justify the bra and panties, a girdle? How could Linda ever understand why I was wearing a girdle. And Charlotte's girdle for that matter!
I walked quietly to my room and picked up the girdle from the floor, and the stockings and neatly folded them up, and brought them back out to the living room. I might as well give them back to Charlotte, I thought. She'd never let me wear them again. That was for sure! I then went back to my room and straightened up the mess in my bedroom. I took off the ripped jeans, put on my own panties that I had been wearing before and then put on the other pair of Mudd's that wasn't ripped. I folded up the ripped jeans and put them on the dresser and went back to the living room to wait for Ethel. She came out in a few minutes and sat down next to me on the sofa.
"Well, Charlotte is resting comfortably now. I convinced her to take a sedative and she'll probably sleep for awhile. She's pretty angry with you. I did tell her that you were sorry, but I'm afraid she's not buying it. This is going to be a difficult situation."
The news depressed me, and I said, "I'm afraid she might really hurt me. I mean with her belt, or grabbing my ear or something."
"No, Greg, she won't just start up and hit you. She might want to punish you, like ground you or something. I don't know. But I will have another word with her when she gets up."
"But at night, I'd be alone with her now that Lei's gone, and she can do anything to me she wants!"
"Calm down, Greg. Don't think about it. Your imagination is sometimes way too active! Lets you and I have lunch!"
"I'm not really hungry," I said unconvinced that just ignoring the problem would make it go away.
"Have a small sandwich anyway," Ethel said.
"OK."
We made sandwiches and when we were done and cleaning up the dishes, Ethel said, "you know I just had a brain storm."
"About what?"
"About how to iron out the problems with Charlotte. It might even be a really good thing for both of you, individually."
"What could I do?"
"Well, since you sort of "killed" Vickie for Charlotte, I mean you told her that she was crazy for believing in her lost child, then maybe you could replace Vickie in a sense. Sort of become an imaginary Vickie to replace the imaginary Vickie you killed."
"How could I possibly become Vickie? I don't understand." It sounded completely weird to me. Becoming an imaginary girl?
"Well, we do have all of Vickie's clothes..."
"Oh no, Ethel! I couldn't possibly!"
"And you told me that you would love the opportunity to play dress ups with girls clothes..."
"But you know that Charlotte would kill me if I touched Vickie's clothes!"
"But not if she was getting something precious in return. She's never had her Vickie at all, except only in her imagination, and then maybe for just now she'd have her Vickie."
"She'd take one look at me wearing Vickie's clothes and I'd be toast! Besides, I'm a boy, and I don't look like her precious Vickie."
"One thing at a time, Greg. While Vickie's clothes mean a lot to Charlotte, she has only been upset with you because of the way you treated them. Not so much that you touched them. You saw how fast she changed her mind and gave you Vickie's bra and panties. She was also debating whether to let you play dress ups in Vickie's dresses, just before everything went crazy. In any event, most of Vickie's clothes can be replaced if Charlotte wants to, and they've all just been sitting around unused and its sort of a shame they haven't been worn."
"OK, so lets say it doesn't freak her that I'm wearing Vickie's clothes. How could I possibly act like a girl?"
"Well, you're exactly the right size for the clothes, and Charlotte already sees you as being a girl, at least emotionally. Your body is also more feminine than masculine."
"Ethel!" I said hotly, making a face, "how would you like it if I called YOU a man!"
Ethel said, "Now don't overreact. I'm not saying your not a boy. I'm only saying that you have enough girlish qualities about you that I think you could pass it off very well. You do have graceful arms, legs and hands and your face is more round than square. And your hair only needs a slight trim to be a girls cut. Granted you don't have curves, but that could be fixed. The biggest problem would be if you could put your manhood to rest long enough for you to give it your best shot. You could think of it like you're playing at being Vickie."
"So its just acting?"
"No, that wouldn't be quite right. What would work would be to just let yourself follow your inner desires to be feminine, and let that take over your mind. Just completely suspend the little voice inside your head which wants to fight for your masculinity, the little voice that tries to make you feel guilty or a freak or whatever. Just let the girl in you take control of your feelings and emotions. You know the girl inside you that yearns to wear a bra or slip whenever you find the chance. Feel the feminine feelings as being the real you. Make the boy in you into a vague and distant dream."
"That's very poetic Ethel, but I don't know. That seems so hard!"
Ethel chuckled, "Greg, you're such a marvelously sensitive boy, I mean girl! So what do you think? Do you think this might work?"
I thought about it for a minute and said, "I guess the only problems are that Charlotte might not agree with you and me, and I might find that I'm not able to stop being my boy self, but it is probably worth a shot. If nothing else, I'd finally get to dress up in a lot of pretty clothes, so I'd find out what that feels like. Though before I have to go home I'll be Greg again!"
"So that's a yes?"
"Yes, Aunt Ethel," I said and I got up and hugged her. "I think its a great plan."
"I agree! And don't think that you can't be Greg anytime you have to! OK?"
"OK! I'll make sure to remember that!"
We smiled at each other for a minute and then I added, "So what's the first thing to do?"
"Well, let's see. Vickie has everything you need basically, except we ought to get you your own makeup, and lets try on her shoes right now and make sure they fit!"
We went back to my room and opened up the closet containing the large collection of Vickie's clothes. I stepped into a pair of her penny loafers, and found miraculously enough that they fit fine.
"I guess Vickie's feet are a bit large for a girl and yours are a bit small for a boy, so her shoes fit! That's great. So all we really need to get is some makeup and probably we ought to get you some pantyhose, since the lord knows they run faster than a coyote in heat!"
I laughed and Ethel said, "So, you want to go on a quick shopping trip with me?"
"Sure!"
"Put on a shirt and some shoes and let's go!"
Ethel turned around to go, when she stopped and said, "oh, oh, I forgot one important thing!"
"What's that?"
"That stuffed bra will never work! The panties make you look lopsided and misshapen. We'll have to get you some nice falsies. In fact, a few blocks away from here is a medical supply store."
"Do you really think I should?" I said in wonder at the thought of getting breasts. It seemed like it was going too far, and an ominous feeling entered my stomach that I couldn't completely shake off.
"So you better put on your bra, Greg, so we can you fit for the right size breasts."
"But people will see!"
"No, just put on a dark shirt. It'll hide your bra. Do you have a black shirt?"
"Yes."
"Good, put that on."
I put the bra back on, and then put on my black tee shirt over it. Looking in the mirror, I could see the faint outlines of the bra. "Ethel, its still visible."
"Not really. Only by someone who was looking to see it. Don't worry, it will be fine. We're not going to go too far anyway."
We walked three blocks downtown until we came to a corner store whose window was filled with crutches, wheel chairs and other medical equipment. "Not very romantic," Ethel said, "but they sell mastectomy aids."
Upon entering the store, a stocky, middle aged, man with slightly graying hair, and a moustache greeted us.
"Hello, and what can I do for you?" he said pleasantly.
I was not prepared to be waited on by a man. Somehow I thought it would have to be a woman, like in the lingerie shop. I couldn't believe that Ethel was actually going to tell him that I wanted to buy a pair of breasts, when I heard her say, "we're here to buy some breast forms for my friend here," pointing at me.
The man stiffened, stood up tall and I could see him make a face of disgust, "no, no, you've come to the wrong place. We're a serious business."
"We have a serious need!" Ethel said.
"I'm sorry, but I don't cater to this kind of thing."
"Our money is as good as anybody else's!" Ethel said indignantly.
"Goodbye!" the man said and walked away from us shaking his head and not looking back.
Ethel called out after him, "but where else can we go?"
The man didn't answer and so we walked outside back into the sunlight.
"We should go home," I said dejectedly. "This is not going to work. I've got some serious problems!"
"We've just begun to shop, Greg!" Ethel said light heartedly. "You're going to let one grumpy old fool run your life? There's more than one store where we can buy what we need!"
"How will we ever find another one?"
"The phone book?" Ethel said, and led me to a nearby phone booth, where she looked up medical supply stores in the yellow pages. After searching with her finger, she announced gaily, "there's another one down the block on the right. Silverman's. Maybe three blocks. Let's go find it!"
We crossed the street and walked the few blocks in silence. If the same thing happened at Silverman's that had just happened, then that was it. I was definitely going to nix this whole crazy idea.
It was hard to miss Silverman's since it had a huge yellow and red sign covering the space over several large plate glass windows.
"This is it," Ethel said, "Silverman's."
The store was considerably larger than the first one. A blonde headed man, probably in his twenties was behind a counter, and looked up when we entered. "Yes, ma'am?" he said to Ethel, raising his eyebrows.
"We're looking for breast forms for my friend here."
The clerk smiled, and called out toward the back of the store, "Cathy! Someone for you!" Turning toward us he said, "Cathy will be right here to help you."
I felt an enormous sense of relief, and even better when Cathy appeared from a back room. She was very pretty, also in her mid twenties, with dark hair growing just to her shoulders. The clerk said to her, "the boy needs boobs."
"John!" Cathy laughed and turned to Ethel and I and said, "please don't mind him, he's still learning the terminology. Its "breast forms, numbskull!" Now you come with me to the back and we'll get a little privacy!" Ethel and I followed her into a room, and she slid a curtain across the opening so we were alone.
She had me sit down, and I couldn't help myself from shaking like a leaf.
"So what can I do for you?" Cathy asked pleasantly.
I looked up at Ethel waiting for her to answer.
"We would like to get some breast forms for Greg. Its for a role he'll be playing!" Ethel said and smiled.
I had a noticeable tremor and Cathy said, "Don't worry, and please relax, I'm not going to bite!"
"I'm sorry," I said, "I never got you know before..."
"Breasts? Well, I can understand why you're nervous, if you've never had them before, but trust me, I've had them since I was thirteen, and they're not so scary!" The last part of this, Cathy said cupping her hand to her mouth and whispering.
I couldn't help but laugh, and then Cathy said, "the first thing you'll have to do for me is take off your blouse."
"Shirt?" I said.
"Oh, pardon me, "shirt!" Cathy said.
I gingerly took it off to reveal the bra.
"My goodness, you're wearing a bra under your shirt! That'll simplify everything! And what a pretty bra it is! Now how big a chest do you want, Greg?"
I starred at her speechless, not knowing what to say, when luckily Ethel answered, "just to fill out his bra. That should be large enough. Is that OK, Greg?"
"Yeah, Ethel, I guess that'll be fine!"
"That I can do," Cathy said, "I just need to know your bra size, Greg."
"I don't know!" I said with obvious alarm.
"No need to panic!" she said, "we'll just look on the tag in the back." She reached around me and turned the bra strap outwards and leaned over and read the size, "36B."
"Is that good" I said, and Ethel and Cathy broke into laughter.
"It depends on yourself. For some girls it is too much, for others it is too little and for most, luckily, it is just right."
I felt a bit stupid, "oh," I said.
"For your body size, a 36B will look just perfect. A very nice figure!"
Cathy proceeded to reach up on a shelf and take down three boxes. "I can make you a small 36B, a medium one, or a large one. We'll try all three and see which looks and fits the best in your bra and that you're happiest with."
"That sounds good," I said.
"I'm glad we agree!"
She opened up one of the boxes and took out a breast form and slipped it into my right bra cup. Then repeated it for the other breast.
"There, take a look in the mirror."
The sensation was different than just wearing the bra. The breasts had a density and weight that I could feel against my chest, and I could see that the bra cups were pushed out and full. I also felt the straps on my back and shoulder pushing against my skin.
"These are the smaller breasts. Notice that there is just a wee bit of room left in the cups. Turn sideways in the mirror and note how far they protrude."
I did that and marveled at how nice it was to have a figure where I'd never had one before.
"I really like these," I said.
"Try on the others before you decide!" Cathy said, "your making this too easy." She replaced the breasts in the bra with the middle sized ones.
"Now you see that the bra is completely filled," Cathy said, "see the greater projection and weight." She gently guided me to turn sideways in the mirror. My chest was standing out more noticeably than with the smaller breasts.
"OK, now we go for the big ones!" She replaced the middle sized breasts with the largest ones and said, "these just fit but barely in your bra.
They even pop up a tiny bit over the top, but that's OK."
It was immediately clear to me that these were the breasts I wanted. They were prominent and reminded me of the look that Charlotte had with her tight blouse. Perhaps they were the same size as Lei's breasts, I couldn't tell for sure.
"Ethel, these are definitely the ones I like!" I said. "Don't you think they are as big as Lei's. That I look as big as she does?"
"I suppose you're right, Greg. But its not good to be competitive. We each have what God gives us you know!"
"I'm sorry. Its not that I want to be bigger than Lei, but it would be nice to be at least equal to her!"
"Then I think we have achieved that! What do you think, Cathy?
They aren't too big for him?"
"Put on your shirt Greg, and lets take a look that way," Cathy said.
I did as she said. The effect was dramatic in the tight shirt. My chest looked like any really sexy girl that I'd seen at school or in the street.
"These are really great!" I exclaimed.
"They do look right for your body. You even could go for a teensy bit larger breast form, but you'd have to switch to a bigger bra, one in the C cup range," Cathy added.
"No, these are plenty big enough!" Ethel said, "we don't want to overdo it!"
"Then I can get these, Ethel? Can I?"
"Of course, Greg," Ethel said and then to Cathy, "wrap them up!"
"Thank you Ethel!" I said.
"You can wear them out if you want," Cathy said.
My face suddenly clouded over in panic and I said, "oh no, that wouldn't be too smart!" I glanced worriedly at Ethel.
"Of course you don't have to wear them home, Greg!" Ethel said, "what are you thinking?"
I managed to make a wan smile, "I was remembering when I wore the Mudd jeans out of the store."
"Before you go," Cathy interrupted, "I have to explain to Greg about the proper care of the breast forms. First of all, he should know that these breasts come with an adhesive, which gives you the option of wearing them without a bra. See this box of adhesive pads? You put one on the breast form, then while wearing a bra, to help you align it, you lay the breast on your chest and press down. Then it will adhere there until you want to take it off. There's a special non-toxic solvent for that purpose. But, of course, you can always just wear the breasts in your bra, and then you won't have to worry about attaching them."
I must have looked worried since Cathy asked, "do you think you can figure it out. Its not really complicated!"
"I suppose so," I said hesitantly.
"You don't sound so confidant. I'll have to show you how mine are held on," Cathy said, and began lifting up her blouse revealing her bra.
My jaw dropped as she revealed more and more of her ample bosom in its white bra, until she said, "Look at him! I'm just teasing! Mine are ALL real!" She was laughing uproariously. "You're a funny boy. That's for sure!"
I turned red and Ethel shook her head laughing. "I think that's enough of that, Greg. I am sure between Greg and myself we'll figure out how to get his breasts on the right way. Anyway, we better be on our way!"
Cathy wrapped up the box containing the breast forms, Ethel paid for it, and we were out the door heading back to the apartment.
On the way, we stopped at a drug store, where she took me to the
pantyhose section and decided that I should wear size "B"
pantyhose. Then she picked out some lipstick, blush, foundation,
and eyeliner
"One last thing is to get you some bubble bath and bath oil, but not here," Ethel said. "I know a perfume shop up the street, we'll go there."
In the perfume shop she asked me to smell several scents until I found one that I was fond of. The one I chose was called "Escada." It seemed to me to be as feminine a scent as I could imagine, and I got little chills up and down my spine thinking that I could put some on back in the apartment.
As we walked the few blocks home, I grew increasingly excited, and images of pink lace and thin delicate straps danced in my mind. I had only glanced quickly through Vickie's dresses the day I had arrived at Charlotte's apartment, and I wondered what the dresses felt and looked like up close. I tightly held the small shopping bag containing the breast forms, and marveled at their weight.
Charlotte was still sleeping when we entered the apartment, and Ethel took me right to my room and turned on the bath water. "I'm going to set you up with the bubbles, and I'll be back in 15 minutes to help you get dressed. I think its important for you to be squeaky clean and smelling your best, OK?"
"I've never had a bubble bath, before, except when I was a little kid and I don't really remember that."
"Well its one thing that makes girls really lucky they're girls!"
I watched Ethel dump in the bath crystals and saw the bubbles shoot up. "I also put in some of these bath oil spheres, which melt in the hot water and make it real slippery and sensuous. I personally just love bath oils!"
Ethel left the room, and I got undressed and then slipped into the water. It was hot on my ankles, but I quickly got used to it and sat down in it. I jumped when the hot water first swirled around my penis and balls, but it made them feel warm and cozy deep down in my loins, and I settled back in the tub, finally slipping under the water so my face and hair were wet. Ethel was right about the slippery bath oil. I liked the way it felt on my skin. And I loved the flowery aroma of the soap. I lay there and thought this has got to be the most relaxing thing I've ever done in my life. To think that girls take advantage of it all the time, and boys consider it something for girls only! Every part of me tingled with pleasure and the thought drifted into my mind that in just a few minutes I'd get to wear my breasts, and then I'd get to open up Vickie's closet and actually get the chance to pick one of her dresses to wear. It was too marvelous to bear! I will be the most perfect niece that an aunt ever had. I'll be so radiant, that Charlotte's heart will melt, and she'll probably cry and feel love for me!
I was sure that Ethel was the most wonderful woman in the world. I had never felt so loved by anyone as her. She has been so kind to me and I'd marry her if I wasn't just a kid. I remembered her good cheer after the first shop rejected us. That's one thing about Ethel, she always is kind and cheerful.
That's the kind of girl I'll be. Never will I be a Charlotte. Mean, with bizarre fantasies and hatred for men! God, would my mom and dad be surprised to find out that this all lurks underneath her phony exterior! Though my dad is sure suspicious of her. He even seemed to know that she'd be busting my balls! I smiled thinking of my mom and dad and how I wished I could tell them about everything happening, and especially about Ethel.
Then I thought about being dressed in Vickie's dress, and underneath would be her panties and bra, and her slip and maybe even her crinolines, and what would happen if my mom and dad were standing there? My dad's face would be all twisted up in a frown, alternating to anger. He'd shake his head in denial as if that would make it all go away. And my mom would say, "get out of those clothes this instant! You're not my daughter! You're not allowed to be a girl. Take that dress off this instant! What? you're wearing a slip, and a bra and what's in your bra?
What kind of horrible boy are you!"
"Greg?"
Somewhere in the distance I realized that my name was being called, and I snapped out of the reverie realizing that Ethel was calling me.
"Greg have you fallen asleep?"
"No Ethel, sorry, I was just day dreaming." I shivered all over and felt an empty chasm in my chest. This was not going to be as easy as I had hoped.
"Can I come in?" Ethel said.
"I'm still in the tub."
"I've got your towel."
"OK."
Ethel came in and I cupped my hands over my penis to hide it from her.
"My, my, don't you look comfortable. And boy do you smell good!"
"Ethel, I'm not so sure that I ought to do this. Won't it break my mom and dad's hearts if they found out?"
"Oh, honey, you poor dear! You torture yourself so. I think it comes with being so smart, Greg. You think about everything. You're so worried about others feelings. Someday your going to make some woman so happy she'll burst with joy!"
"But if I'm Vickie? You saw Linda and the other girls."
"Right now today, you'll be Vickie. Tomorrow, who knows? When the summer is over you'll be whoever you want to be, whenever you want to be it! That's the way I think of it. Right now you and I have the big job of winning over Charlotte. So lets get down to work in making you the absolutely prettiest little Vickie she ever saw. And as Charlotte says, you're only going to find out about yourself by doing it, and there's no harm in that!"
Her speech made me feel bold, and I stood up quietly without being bashful, and Ethel wrapped the big pink towel around me. I grabbed her very hard giving her as big a hug as I could, with my face buried in her chest. "I love you Ethel!" I said. I couldn't see her face, but I could tell she was fighting back tears.
"And I love you too Greg. Let's pray it all goes well."
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